In this episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn Baker peels back the layers on what abuse often looks like in the beginning — before it becomes obvious. Instead of visible violence or control, many abusive relationships begin quietly, through subtle shifts in behavior, boundary-testing, love-bombing, and emotional manipulation. Autumn explores how “conditioning” works: shaping your sense of self, your comfort with discomfort, and your tolerance for things that don’t feel right — all while making you believe you’re loved, protected, and “lucky.”

Listeners will learn to identify early warning signs including:

• The “perfect partner” act and love-bombing.

• Critiques disguised as caring comments.

• Small, consistent boundary tests.

• Guilt banking and “favors” that become leverage.

• Fast-forwarded emotional intimacy.

• The “foot-in-the-door” technique: small asks leading to bigger demands.

• The slow slide into justifying behavior that feels off, or minimizing discomfort.

We share how these patterns are often missed — even by people who love deeply and believe the best. She encourages listeners to trust their instincts, notice their body’s reactions, and reach out to safe people if something doesn’t feel right.

Why This Episode Matters: Understanding early conditioning gives listeners power. Early recognition can help prevent deeper abuse. Even if you’re not currently in a relationship, this episode offers awareness — knowledge that could protect you or someone you care about in the future.

Who Should Listen:

• Anyone questioning a relationship’s early dynamic.

• Survivors reflecting on their past.

• Friends or family who want to support a loved one.

• Anyone wanting to better understand how abuse can begin subtly.

In this rewind episode, we revisit the often overlooked reality that domestic abuse doesn’t only affect the survivor — it impacts everyone who loves them. Family and friends carry their own fear, confusion, grief, and emotional wounds as they watch someone they care about struggle. This conversation explores how abuse ripples through relationships, why those around the survivor are affected so deeply, and how healing extends beyond just one person. .

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Domestic abuse doesn’t only affect the victim; it leaves deep scars on everyone around them. In Episode 3, Autumn Baker explores the far-reaching impact of domestic violence on children, friends, and family members. This episode sheds light on the trauma and challenges that loved ones face, revealing how abuse creates ripples that extend through entire communities and generations. Join us as we discuss how we can support those affected and work together toward healing.

Strangulation is one of the most lethal forms of domestic violence — yet many victims minimize it because there are often few or no visible marks. In this episode, Autumn breaks down what strangulation actually is, why it is medically dangerous, and why it is one of the strongest predictors of homicide in abusive relationships.

This episode explains:

• The difference between choking and strangulation

• How little pressure is required to stop blood flow to the brain

• How quickly unconsciousness and death can occur

• Why bruising often does not appear immediately — or at all

• Short-term and long-term medical effects

• How to document strangulation safely and discreetly

• Why strangulation is treated as a high-lethality warning sign

If you have experienced strangulation — even once — your fear is valid. Your safety matters. Support exists, and you deserve to access it when you are ready.

A year ago on Halloween, Almost Oblivious was born — a small podcast with a big purpose: to break the silence on domestic violence.

What started as my personal healing journey has grown into a community of survivors, advocates, and listeners who remind me every day that our stories matter.

In this special anniversary episode, I’m opening up about who I am, why I started this podcast, and how this past year has changed everything — from turning 30, navigating narcolepsy, working full time, and preparing to welcome our baby boy, to reflecting on how far we’ve come together.

💜 Here’s to one year of courage, community, and growth — and to the many stories still to come.

In this personal episode, host Autumn Baker opens up about what it’s like to sit in the quiet after escaping chaos — and how silence can feel both healing and heavy.

“The Silence After the Storm” explores the strange, unsettling calm that survivors often face after leaving an abusive relationship, and the quiet that sometimes comes before they leave — when they begin to emotionally disconnect to survive.

Autumn also shares her own reflections on slowing down, navigating narcolepsy during pregnancy, and learning that rest isn’t weakness — it’s part of recovery.

If you’ve ever felt like the stillness after abuse was too quiet, too lonely, or too confusing, this episode is a gentle reminder: you’re not broken. You’re healing. You're not alone.

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Autumn sits down for a educational conversation about what healthy conflict really looks like — and how it differs from the toxic, fear-based conflict so many survivors have experienced.

Drawing from her own personal experiences, Autumn contrasts the unhealthy, controlling conflict dynamics in her past abusive relationship with the safe, understanding communication she’s found with her husband, Zack. Through compassion and education, she explores how trauma impacts our nervous system’s response to conflict and how survivors can begin to unlearn fear, rebuild trust, and experience peace in new relationships.

This episode is perfect for anyone healing from abuse, supporting a survivor, or simply wanting to understand how to handle conflict in healthier, more loving ways.

💜 In this episode, you’ll hear about:

• How toxic conflict often disguises itself as “normal”

• The key traits of healthy vs. unhealthy communication

• How trauma affects your body’s response to disagreement

• What accountability, empathy, and repair look like in healthy relationships

• Personal reflections on unlearning chaos and learning safety

Autumn also shares updates, a thank-you for one year of Almost Oblivious, and a gentle reminder to be patient as she works through listener emails!

In this episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn dives into an often-overlooked consequence of domestic violence: how abuse seeps into the workplace, derails careers, and forces survivors to rebuild from setbacks. She shares her own (vague) experience with losing a job due to her situation, and walks listeners through:

• The many forms workplace abuse can take (from harassment to retaliation)

• Real-life survivor scenarios and how abuse impacted their work lives

• Career setbacks survivors commonly face (gaps in work history, loss of confidence, economic abuse)

• Strategies for rebuilding: resume framing, exploring trauma-informed employers, networking, and community resources

• Legal protections and “safe leave” laws (federal and state-level) — with the crucial advice: check your own state laws

• Words of hope: your career may have been disrupted, but it can be rebuilt on your terms

Listeners will have a better understanding of how DV affects professional life — and actionable tools to move forward.

In this short episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn shares space to process the collective heaviness following the recent tragedy in our country. Violence—no matter where it happens—leaves behind shock, grief, and trauma. Autumn offers reminders for coping in difficult times: unplugging from social media, stepping back from the 24/7 news cycle, grounding in the present moment, and leaning on community for support.

This episode is a reminder that we were never meant to carry trauma alone. Healing begins when we pause, breathe, and care for ourselves and each other.

In this episode of Almost Oblivious, host Autumn Baker explores how creative outlets can become powerful tools for healing after trauma and abuse. From art and journaling to faith, movement, volunteering, and trying new experiences, Autumn shares both research and personal stories of how creativity can help survivors rediscover their voice, purpose, and joy.

You’ll hear about:

• Art as therapy: how expression through color, shape, or collage can give emotions a safe outlet.

• Journaling: prompts and practices to untangle thoughts and track healing progress.

• Faith and spirituality: grounding practices that offer hope and connection.

• New experiences: how classes like singing, cooking, or photography can unlock joy.

• Exercise and movement: the research-backed benefits of biking, yoga, and other forms of physical activity for trauma recovery.

• Volunteering and purpose: how giving back, speaking out, and creating Almost Oblivious became transformative parts of Autumn’s own healing journey.

This episode encourages survivors to explore creative paths that fit their lives, reminding each listener that healing is not about perfection — it’s about rediscovery.

Abuse doesn’t end when the relationship does. Its impact lingers—sometimes for years—reshaping the way survivors see themselves, others, and the world around them. In this episode of Almost Oblivious, host Autumn Baker explores the long-term effects of abuse on mental health, including PTSD, anxiety, depression, and the invisible wounds survivors carry long after leaving.

Autumn also shares exciting personal news—she and her husband Zack are expecting their first baby! With pregnancy and managing narcolepsy, the episode schedule may shift, but her passion for sharing survivor-centered conversations remains stronger than ever.

Abuse is surrounded by harmful myths — ideas like “if it was really that bad, they would just leave” or “abuse only happens in certain kinds of relationships.” These misconceptions silence survivors, excuse abusers, and keep too many people stuck in unsafe situations.

In this episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn unpacks some of the most common myths about abuse and replaces them with the reality survivors live every day. From the dangers of leaving, to abuse beyond the physical, to the stigma male victims face, this conversation is all about truth, awareness, and breaking down barriers.

If you’ve ever heard these myths — or maybe even believed them yourself — this episode will help you see the bigger picture.

Leaving an abusive relationship is one of the hardest — and most dangerous — steps a survivor can take. In this episode of Almost Oblivious, I share some of my personal journey of leaving, blending my own story with the emotional realities, safety concerns, and aftermath that so many victims face.

From the quiet moments before the decision, to the day I walked out, to the unexpected emotional crash afterward — this is a raw, honest look at what leaving really feels like from the inside.

Whether you’re a survivor, supporting someone you love, or simply wanting to understand, I hope this episode reminds you that you are not alone, and there is life and healing on the other side.

Have we been trained to overlook the signs that someone isn’t safe or manipulative? Or worse—what if we’ve never been taught what healthy love and relationships actually look like?

In this episode of Almost Oblivious, we explore the differences between red flags and green flags—not just in romantic relationships, but in friendships, family dynamics, and everyday connections.

You’ll learn how to:

• Identify red flag behaviors like control, love bombing, and guilt-tripping

• Understand the psychological reasons why red flags can feel “normal”

• Recognize green flag qualities like emotional safety, consistency, and respect

• Compare real-life examples of toxic vs. healthy dynamics

• Rebuild your internal radar for healthy relationships—even if you’ve never seen them before

Whether you're just starting to heal or you're trying to unlearn old patterns, this episode will help you redefine what safe, healthy, and mutual love actually looks like.

Because peace isn’t boring—it’s just unfamiliar.

A question many survivors wrestle with — especially after betrayal, emotional harm, or abuse. In this episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn Baker dives deep into what science, psychology, and personal experience say about real change.

We explore the difference between remorse and reform, the neuroscience of behavior, and why real transformation requires more than just words. Autumn also speaks directly to critical issues like physical abuse, infidelity, and narcissistic traits — offering grounded, trauma-informed guidance to anyone stuck between hope and reality.

Some things are forgivable. Some are survivable. But not everything deserves a second chance.

If you’ve ever asked, “Should I stay?” or “Can they really change?” — this episode is for you.

In this survivor story, we hear from Tracey, who grew up under the control of a narcissistic and emotionally abusive mother — a kind of abuse that’s often hidden behind smiles, church functions, and perfect family photos. From subtle manipulation to overt guilt-tripping, this story explores how emotional abuse from a parent can shape your self-worth, relationships, and sense of reality.

As the survivor begins to set boundaries and ultimately go no contact, the manipulation escalates — but so does their decision. This episode offers a raw, honest look at the grief of choosing peace over family and the courage it takes to break free from generational cycles.

If you've ever been made to feel small, guilty, or like you're “too sensitive” by a family member, this episode is for you.

⚠️ Trigger warning: emotional abuse, narcissistic manipulation, parent-child estrangement.

You are not alone. You are not crazy. And you are worthy of peace.

In this honest episode, Autumn shares her personal experience with an abusive partner who twisted the truth and claimed to be the victim. She breaks down the manipulation tactic known as DARVO, highlights the damage it causes, and provides practical tools for those navigating similar experiences.

This episode is a reminder that your story matters—even when someone else tries to steal it.

DARVO:

• Deny the behavior

• Attack the victim’s credibility

• Reverse the Victim and Offender

In this special episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn Baker is joined by licensed professional counselor Isaiah from Therapy Today to dive into the mental health side of healing after abuse. Together, they explore the emotional toll of toxic environments, how survivors can begin to rebuild their self-worth, and why therapy—whether trauma-focused or not—can be an essential part of the journey.

Isaiah offers practical advice on setting healthy boundaries, breaking unhealthy relationship patterns, and supporting loved ones who have left abusive situations. Whether you're in the process of healing or supporting someone who is, this episode offers guidance, validation, and hope.

Guest Info: Isaiah, LPC, is the voice behind Therapy Today, where he brings professional insight to everyday mental health struggles.

Follow Therapy Today Here:

⁠https://www.youtube.com/@Therapy2Day⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/therapy.2day⁠

Healing after abuse is not a straight road — and if you’ve ever felt like you were “going backward,” this episode is for you.

In this honest and vulnerable solo episode, Autumn opens up about why she missed last week’s show and shares her ongoing struggle with severe back pain, medical frustration, and the very real truth that healing—whether physical or emotional—is rarely neat or predictable.

She dives into her journey, including moments of PTSD, nightmares, and intrusive thoughts that still creep in years after escaping an abusive relationship. This episode is a powerful reminder that setbacks do not erase progress and that healing happens in layers.

Whether you're still in a situation, freshly out, or years into your healing journey, you’ll find comfort, validation, and truth in this week’s message: You are not behind. You are healing, even when it doesn’t feel like it.

When we talk about domestic violence, we often leave someone out of the conversation—men.

In this eye-opening episode of Almost Oblivious, we confront the stigma, silence, and stereotypes that keep so many male victims from speaking out. Abuse doesn’t discriminate—and yet, male victims are often met with disbelief, shame, or mockery when they try to seek help.

💔 1 in 4 men experience physical violence from a partner. 💬 Many never say a word. 📉 Limited resources. Deep-rooted stigma. Real pain.

It’s time we stop asking why they stayed—and start asking how we can support them.

This episode includes: 🔹 Eye-opening statistics 🔹 Common forms of abuse men face 🔹 Barriers to seeking help 🔹 A call for better resources & compassion for ALL survivors

Living with someone who has narcissistic traits — whether it's a partner, a parent, or someone else close to you — can feel like constant emotional warfare. In this episode of Almost Oblivious, Autumn Baker shares practical, solution-based strategies to help reduce conflict and protect your mental and emotional peace when leaving isn’t yet an option.

Drawing from recent training with Stepping Stones of Life and personal experience, this episode offers clear communication tools, boundary-setting techniques, and calming responses that can help you survive day to day — and remind you that you are not alone.

⚠️ Please note: These strategies are meant to help mitigate, not eliminate, the effects of narcissistic abuse. If your safety is at risk or you feel overwhelmed, you do not have to navigate this alone.

🛠️ In This Episode:

• Understanding narcissistic behavior and common patterns

• Ground rules for emotional protection

• Real-life examples of communication shifts to reduce conflict

• The Grey Rock Method

• Why these tools won’t always work — and why that’s not your fault

• A reminder: You deserve peace, and help is available